EastEnders' Heather Peace says cancer made her feel like a 'dead woman walking'

EastEnders star Heather Peace says hearing she had breast cancer “hit her like a sledgehammer” as she reveals both she and her wife have been battling the disease. Last month, the actress announced she’d undergone surgery and was going through chemotherapy since her diagnosis in October.

Now, as she’s about to start radiotherapy, Heather tells how partner Ellie Dickinson had got the same news earlier in the year. “Her breast cancer was a smaller, aggressive lump, so she had a lumpectomy and then radiotherapy,” explained Heather, who plays Eve Panesar-Unwin in the BBC soap. “Of course then I come along with my 12 cm lump, absolutely ginormous, and mastectomy, chemotherapy, just about to go into radiotherapy. She’s like ‘Even that you have to do bigger’. It’s like ‘Hold my beer’.”

READ MORE: EastEnders' Ash Panesar's return 'sealed' - and it's bad news for Suki and Eve's marriage

Parents to Annie, 10, and eight-year-old twins Jesse and Lola, the news was devastating to the pair. “There was no processing,” admits Heather.

Finding her own lump after noticing a change in her nipple, Heather admits she tried putting off getting checked because of her EastEnders filming schedule. Encouraged by wife Ellie to go straight away, they were shocked to discover Heather had breast cancer within just three hours of seeing a doctor.

“I swear everybody looked at me, it might be my imagination, but I felt like a dead woman walking,” admitted Heather. “I honestly did because it was so big and so quick that they told us and the seriousness and gravity with which I was told.”

It came just as Heather was about to begin filming big New Year scenes which saw Eve marry Suki Panesar (played by Balvinder Sopal) in a historic lesbian wedding. Still reeling from the news, Heather called her bosses to tell them, who told her she didn’t need to come in. But Heather was determined to film the scenes, to give a “full stop” to the story, fearing she would die.

Enduring a gruelling three week wait for her CT scans results, she said was “the scariest of her entire life” and all she could think about was dying and leaving her young family behind. “I looked at everything I’d done, everybody in my life - my kids, my wife, equal marriage coming in, crazy amounts of stuff - and I felt my goodness, I’ve really packed it in and it’s ok. And actually I’m a bit tired. Those were my honest thoughts. My only concern was breaking anybody else’s heart. I can tell you from the bottom of my heart that was the only thing that bothered me.”

Bradford-born Heather, who previously appeared in London’s Burning and Waterloo Road breathed a sigh of relief when scans showed her cancer hadn’t spread but she would have to undergo major surgery and aggressive chemotherapy. On November 29 she had a left breast mastectomy and immediate reconstruction. After doubts about having an implant put in - Heather says she’s delighted with the results and praised her surgeon for being an “artist”.

“The idea of an implant just gave me the ick,” explained Heather. “You have the option to use your own body material but that can’t happen for a year and it involves incisions in your stomach, bottom. Much bigger operation. Then they bring out the implants and you’re feeling these things. It was Ellie who said ‘I know for you that you wouldn’t cope without a breast as such.’ “So they said if you don’t get on with it we can take it out but I have got on with it. The level of care in the aesthetic, knowing how that can affect a woman mentally. I didn’t realise how much that part of me meant.”

Back in her swimming costume able to take the kids to the pool again, Heather says that was a big moment. “I got in the changing rooms which were communal, I hadn’t considered the breast, doing that in a communal area was a really big move for me,” she said. “You couldn’t tell in a swimming costume.”

She says the hardest change to her appearance has been the hair loss. “The has devastated me actually,” she admitted. "I’m very self conscious at the moment. When you lose your eyelashes and your eyebrows.”

In her announcement last month, Heather was seen trying on a wig in her EastEnders changing room.The video was filmed in February as she underwent intense chemo. Traveling from her home in Brighton to Elstree in Hertfordshire, she continued to film at least two days a week throughout the treatment, determined to keep working, but admitting she could be “shaky”.

She praised the team for their support throughout. “Everyone knew,” Heather told Gaby Roslin on her Reasons To Be Joyful podcast. “I put out a post on our little group WhatsApp and I just felt absolutely enveloped and protected and looked after.”

Having just finished her chemotherapy and about to start on radiotherapy, Heather is looking ahead to a future she thought might be snatched away. “I need to live for the day,” she vows. “We’ve got our three kids. We’re going away on a holiday for two weeks. They’re at that golden age. The twins Jesse and Lola are eight, Annie is 10. The five of us are going away. We’re going on holiday for two weeks and that’s been the thing that I’ve held on to since February, through this whole chemo journey. I just want to enjoy them and try and savour every second.”

Heather says she couldn’t have got through it without Ellie - and says the turmoil has brought them even closer together. “This journey with Ellie, I feel proud of myself, I feel proud of our marriage, it’s the strongest it’s ever been because we can actually do the for sickness and in health, for richer for poorer,” said Heather. “We’ve been able to show up for each other. That bond is so much deeper than the romance from 15 years ago. Marriage is great. You know when you hit another level, there’s something special in that.”

Having turned 50 two weeks ago, there will be no big party - instead Heather will be heading off on a music writing retreat once she’s finished her three-week radiotherapy. “I have changed for the better," she smiles. "It’s about investing time in the people that really matter in my life.”

Listen to the full interview on Gaby Roslin's Reasons to be Cheerful podcast.

Follow Mirror Celebs on Snapchat , Instagram , Twitter , Facebook , and Threads .