'Bawled In Room, Wanted To Smash Myself Into Glass Door': Emraan Hashmi Recalls Son's Heartwrenching Cancer Battle At Age Of 4

Bollywood actor Emraan Hashmi, who prefers to keep his personal life away from the media glare, recently opened up about his son Ayaan's battle with cancer, when he was a little less than 4-years-old. The actor said that his "entire world flipped in 12 hours", and that he cried his eyes out in a room with his wife.

During his appearance on Ranveer Allahbadia's podcast, Emraan shared that it was during a family lunch when he found out about his son's cancer. "On January 13th, we went for brunch at the Taj Lands, and my son had his first symptom at the table. He excused himself and asked my wife to take him to the room because he had passed blood in his urine. That was the first symptom, and from that moment on, our joyful brunch turned into a nightmare. Within three hours, we were at a doctor's clinic, and the doctor told us that our son had cancer. We had to get him operated on the next day and then undergo chemotherapy. My whole world flipped in twelve hours," he recalled.

He shared that his son was 3 years and 10 months old at that time, and that the actor was at the peak of both his personal and professional life. "I kept thinking 'Why me?'. I had a very weak moment when I went home for the first time after my son's diagnosis. I wanted to go into the glass. There was a glass door in the balcony... I wanted to go and smash myself into it. It was a fleeting thought, but that was my turbulent state of mind at that time," Emraan shared.

"I remember when we got the news, we could not even cry in front of our son. We had to come from a place of strength for him, because he was the one who had to endure it. So we actually went into a room and bawled. Because we did not want our son to see us like that and hamper his mental state. But that was the only day. We picked ourselves up and we knew that we had to be strong and do this together," he added.

An emotional Emraan also shared that while his son, who is 15 now, might not remember the ordeal, he remembers every moment of it, and has even penned a book on it to motivate the families of other cancer patients. "I don't think I can also read it or go back to that time. Obviously, I remember everything, but reading it in print is very painful for me," he concluded.